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Chances are, you spent the first few months of your child's life in a zombie-like state due to lack of sleep. The problem most likely eased over time as your baby grew out of his middle-of-the-night feedings and adjusted to his bedtime routines. But now that your child is a toddler -- perhaps even in his own "big-kid bed" -- you occasionally feel like it would be easier to win the lottery than get him to sleep.
Here are a few reasons why he might still resist sleep, and how to cope with each:
Parents: Ask a question or write an answer
1. I rub my daughter's stomach and sing to her at the same time to get her to go to bed on time, I also have what is called "wind-down-time" where i will turn on her night light and i read to her, but i mostly sing to her.
2. "Wind down" time is very important in getting toddlers ready to drift off. Some things that help are baths, one video (unless it winds your child UP) then stories and then when tucked in, listening to a soft music CD (such as James Taylor's greatest hits or Shawn Colvin's Holidays and Lullabyes). Also, no juice after six p.m. helps her not get too hyper.
3. Also a simple bedtime ritual such as a special nighttime kiss or pillow fluff that you share with them every night will give them a secure feeling that bedtime is not a scary time.
4. Everyone needs to feel secure and relaxed to be able to fall asleep. It's best if you start a routine when they're still in a crib so you don't start something new at a time when it's more difficult for them to go to sleep for the night. Predictable routine provides security for little ones, but if you throw in anything unexpected, they snap alert, on guard and ready for action.
Adults who hate boring routine have the hardest time with toddler bedtimes, so if this is a problem for you, it helps to remind yourself ,"This is only half an hour out of my day. This too shall pass." Banish annoyance and irritation from your mind and voice to keep it out of your rate of breathing and even the smell of your skin -- little ones pick up on all those cues, and when you feel agitated, they'll mirror your emotions. Focus on how much you adore your kid, not how you want him to behave, and relax.
Keep your voice quiet yet confident as you go through your own "wind down" routine, whether it's talking about the day, reciting bedtime prayers/meditations, reading a story, or singing.
If Little One fights it, don't fight back, just keep using the same tone of voice and keep focused on the routine. If bedtime routine is new to you, don't expect "7 Days to Success," but DO stick to one routine from here on out. Picture the result you want (relaxed, confident, secure toddler sound asleep) and ACT like it's going to happen. Little Ones follow where you lead.
1. Be realistic about your expectations on a reasonable bedtime. For example, if your child still naps, then eight o'clock may be too early to try and get them down; try 8:30 or 8:45 and you may get better results.
2. In the first year, babies usually nap every 2 hours, with the time between naps growing longer throughout toddlerhood. At the same time, the length of naptime tends to get shorter. If your toddler is still napping every four hours for an hour each time, you might try waking them after half an hour to 45 minutes (provided they're not sick), or you might try keeping them awake an extra half hour each day until they're napping every 5-6hrs. for an hour to 90 minutes at a time (start counting the time between naps from the time they wake). A sample schedule might be: 7AM Morning Wakeup, 11AM-11:30AM Nap, 3:30PM-4PM Nap, 8PM Bedtime. Provide outdoor "fresh air" exercise time that ENDS at least half an hour before each sleep period, preferably before a meal -- or if you can't go outside, play movement games inside (Disney has some great videos for Baby and Toddler movement, just remember that not even Disney is a substitute for YOU - please enjoy the Disney videos WITH your child; I think you'll find that this prevents separation anxiety).
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