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Parentpedia
Sharing
What Experts Say
It's a common conundrum: You want your toddler to share his toys and be generous with his playdates, but he wants to keep his favorite things to himself. However, it's actually somewhat unrealistic to expect a child to willingly share much before the age of 4, says noted pediatrician William Sears, M.D.
A toddler thinks a beloved possession is a part of who he is, rather than an object separate from himself. When another child plays with that toy or stuffed animal, he's not sure he'll ever get it back.
Some parents ask their children to "take turns" in an effort to teach them about sharing, but Laura Davis, co-author of "Becoming the Parent You Want...
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You may have your own rules about sharing in your house, especially if you have more than one kid. But if your kids are in daycare or a preschool setting, ask about the rules pertaining to sharing if this is concerns you. Many schools do not allow sharing. They understand that sometimes sharing is simply not something a toddler or preschooler is capable of understanding. Often times, if a child is playing with a toy that is desired by another child, the teachers will side with the child that had the toy in the first place. They will tell the other kid to play with something else or wait until the first child is done playing with it. Don't worry that your child will grow up to be a selfish, non-sharing adult if her preschool doesn't allow sharing. Instead understand that they are working with her as she develops and that when she does begin to share, she will have a better understanding of what sharing means. And when she is having a playdate at home, hide the really special stuff so it doesn't cause a problem.
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July 17, 2007
Their own language
One day when our twin girls were around 1 1/2+ years old, I was working at home, our nanny, was cleaning the girls' room and Storey and Ruby, were playing in the playpen. I saw Ruby climb out easily. They were "talking" to each other so... read moreNot Acceptable?