Parentpedia

What Experts Say

The most important function of the teen years is good, old-fashioned, character building, says psychologist Madeline Levine, author of The Price of Privilege. And following through on responsibilities -- such as going to class and turning in required work -- is one of the ways teens build character.

Looking the other way when you find out your teen is cutting class doesn't do him any favors, because it suggests you either didn't see those responsibilities as important in the first place, or are going to let him off the hook rather than risk confrontation.

Instead, this is a basic area where you lay down rules -- your child must attend class -- and establish consequences for breaking those rules. You are sending him mixed messages if you're wishy-washy or permissive when he shirks basic responsibilities.

At the same time, you need to get some honest communication going and find out what's behind the poor attendance. There are almost always specific reasons a teen starts to skip school: Is he overwhelmed by the pressure and is rebelling? Is he being bullied? Are there drugs or alcohol involved? When you find out more about the underlying problem, then you need to advocate for your teen and help him solve the problem. Dropping a class, getting a tutor, or confronting bullying are all constructive ways you can show him you're on his side and want him to succeed.