Parentpedia

What Experts Say

What do you do when your preteen or teen comes home and announces that she's sworn off eating meat? Are you remembering her toddler years when you had to beg her to get a pea past her lips, or freaking out by thoughts of revisiting those food battles?

Whatever your response, first start a dialogue by asking her what her reasons are. They might not be such bad ones; after all, vegetarianism is a popular response to many of the food and environmental issues that are important to today's teens.

Also, in many ways such a personal choice is not entirely under your control, points out Debra Beck, a teen mentor and founder of Spirited Youth and author of "My Feet Aren't Ugly!: A Girl's Guide to Loving Herself from the Inside Out."

"It's not really going to be possible to insist that your child eat meat," Beck says. "Instead, let her know you honor and understand her choice, but make sure she realizes she's accountable for the consequences."

Tips to Make It Work for the Whole Family

You might point out that your teen can't just cut out meat without making other changes to her diet. For example, she has to learn to substitute other forms of protein in order to meet the needs of her growing body.

Even more important, it's your teen's job to learn to cook vegetarian meals and take charge of at least some meal preparation.

"It's not like they get to go vegetarian and Mom gets to make two meals every night," says Beck. "That's not fair. If your child wants to make a choice that requires more work from you and affects the whole family, then she needs to share that work."

Your teen could join you in making dinner several nights a week, or you could cook vegetarian meals for the family a couple of nights a week and then have your teen cook separate meals on the nights the rest of you eat meat. Either way, your teen gets the message that she has to be responsible for her choices.