Advice History
Need for Independence
I think as parents we need to be careful about how we dole out permission for independence. The author may only be half-serious when writing, "let them mow the lawn on Saturday" to earn independence, but it raises a good point. If we send the message to our children that independence is something that can be given and taken away at a parent's whim, and not a right for them, it may foster resentment in them.
This is not to say that a parent doesn't still have the right to, say, ground a child (thereby temporarily taking away their independence), but a child's right - and need - to tread into a world in which they have more dependence should be based on their ability or maturity. Anything else doesn't seem quite fair to me, and might not to them, either.
This is not to say that a parent doesn't still have the right to, say, ground a child (thereby temporarily taking away their independence), but a child's right - and need - to tread into a world in which they have more dependence should be based on their ability or maturity. Anything else doesn't seem quite fair to me, and might not to them, either.
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