Parentpedia

What Experts Say

Scary as it seems, experimentation with drinking and drugs is not unusual during adolescence. In fact, according to researchers at the Washington University School of Medicine, including Dr. Laura Jean Bierut, parents significantly underestimate their teenager's drinking and drug use This is especially true when it comes to harder drugs such as cocaine, though teens most commonly use alcohol, cigarettes, and marijuana. (Experimentation and use increases as teenagers get older.) However, there are things you can do to discourage your teenager from drinking and using drugs, and to help him if he is already doing so.

Parents need to acknowledge that their teenager has probably been exposed to drugs and may have tried them. That said, you should have a serious conversation with your child about drinking and drug use, and, while it's recommended that these conversations begin before adolescence, it's never too late. You should ask questions about your child's exposure, what she sees other kids doing, and how she might handle being at a party where there are drugs or alcohol.

After asking questions and listening to your child, it is a good idea to express how you would like your child to handle situations where alcohol or drugs are present. You can also offer your child some options instead of getting into a car with someone who has used alcohol or drugs or instead of driving himself if he's used alcohol or drugs.

Options might include calling an older cousin or family friend for a ride or taking a taxi (you can give your teen emergency money for such a situation). If you want your child to call you instead of driving when she's been using drugs or alcohol, you should work out what possible consequences might be.

Be sure to check up on your teen and be aware of symptoms of drug use. If you require your child to check in when she gets home at night, you can watch for slurred speech, lack of coordination, bloodshot eyes, jumpiness, rapid speech, or odors of alcohol or marijuana.

More chronic use can lead to changes in personality, mood, and behavior, a drop in grades, changes in her core group of friends, and more secretiveness. If this occurs, you may want to contact a doctor or psychologist for help -- especially if your teen won't talk to you about it.