Advice History

The softest of all approaches is Elizabeth Pantley's The No-Cry Sleep Solution  which is for the most patient parents who have the will to work through the 10-step approach she suggests. Her most important rule for babies under one year is rule number one -- the safety check. Make sure the crib is free of toys, fluffy pillows or anything that can harm your baby. Also, however you let your baby fall asleep on his own, always go back and check to make sure that he is on his back. Children under one year are at risk for SIDS and the American Academy of Pediatrics strongly urges parents to put their children to sleep on their backs.

Write down your action plan 

In the middle of the night is no time to try and remember if you decided to let the baby cry for 5 minutes or 20 before checking or whether it's mom's or dad's turn to do the soothing. A good suggestion is to write down your plan of attack before bed and then stick to it.

Distract yourself & pick an amount of time

Go do something else while you are crying it out.  Keep a monitor on but softly, or stay a room away.  It can be very hard to listen to the crying.  If you have a set time in mind to let the baby cry - stick to that but don't stand by the door or you'll want to cave and go in earlier.  Talk on the phone to a friend for moral support, parents can hang out together but plan a time and go paint your toenails, read, watch tv softly but try not to listen - it'll hurt you more than it upsets baby.  A video monitor is great for this - you can still see that baby is safe but mute it softly so the crying doesn't cause you to go in prematurely.