Eliminate Office Gossip: Six Skills to Kill Off the Rumor Mill at Work

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Who did what to whom? How did she get into trouble? Why did he miss the project deadline? If workplace gossip a part of your office, it is hurting you and your work environment.

Whether it is at the water cooler, in the bathroom or via a corporate instant messaging system, office gossip has become a common part of the 21st Century workplace. As opposed to dealing with complaints and upsets about people directly with them, gossip is "making a derogatory statement about someone about to third person where the opinion of that person is diminished in the eyes of the third person." Besides the obvious problems with such comments, gossip also has many other harmful effects, which is why managers and bosses are trying to replace the sneaky whispers with open, honest communication.

"People have an amazing ability to be productive and creative, but not in the presence of gossip," states Scott Hunter, author of "Making Work Work" (Hunter Alliance Press, $19.95, www.THPAlliance.com), "When gossip infects the workplace, people shift their focus to what is wrong and what is not working, rather than on what is possible."

For more than two decades consulting for businesses like Coldwell Banker, Pepsi-Cola, and IBM, Hunter has found that there are many consequences when gossip takes over an organization. These consequences result in some serious costs that can be detrimental to any work environment.

When gossip is present, "there is no communication, no understanding, no appreciation of the other person's position, no intimacy, and certainly no trust," says Hunter. These consequences cost an organization more than just happiness within the workplace. Gossip causes turnover and "costs productivity, creativity, teamwork, enthusiasm, success," and ultimately relationships. All of which can be irreversible problems if left to grow and spread within a company.

How to Eliminate Office Gossip:

The key is not to suppress gossip or for people to bite their tongues, but rather for people to communicate their upsets and disappointments in an appropriate manner so that progress can be made.

Open, honest communication is one of the most important keys to building lasting relationships between co-workers and keeping gossip from invading the workplace. Here are six of Hunter's Top Workplace Communication Skills:

- Don't take another's comments personally
- Listen with compassion
- Give up the need to be right
- Look for the best in people
- Acknowledge people
- Communicate upsets

Communication, however, means nothing if no one is listening. That is why knowing how to listen effectively is also a very vital part of building relationships and squashing office gossip. Hunter says, "The question is not whether we are listening when someone speaks to us; rather, it's a question of how we are listening."

Just hearing someone's speech and occasionally replying with a "yes" and "uh-huh," is not effective listening. Hunter recommends a new way of listening where you are conscious of what you are listening to, you are committed and involved in the conversation, and you are placing your attention on the other person. This is opposed to having your attention on yourself and only paying attention to what you are thinking about what they are saying. Doing this makes the interaction a source of real communication and a place to begin building relationships.

With open communication and more attentive listening, the need to gossip about what is wrong will be unnecessary, and a place to begin talking about what is possible will be created.

Hunter's "Making Work Work" offers much-needed advice on how to dispel office gossip and use our communication and listening skills in order to grow as an organization. Beyond these skills, "Making Work Work" also includes how to be truly happy and satisfied, how to clean up the "messes" people create in their relationships, and how to create an organization where people actually look forward to coming to work.

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