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Gift-Giving Draft
Rated by 1 member
One day each year, my husband's side of the family gathers for an event so exciting, it approaches the intensity of an NFL draft.
We never plan this family ritual in advance. Some would say this is because we prefer spontaneity; others would admit it's because none of us is that organized. We don't have firm rules carved in stone and ratified by Congress, but I have noticed three common factors:
1. Usually the event takes place during the summer or early fall when we've gathered for some other reason, such as a barbeque or birthday.
2. There are always at least three factions of the family present.
3. And — make of this what you will — Great-Grandma is always one of them.
Once those three pieces are in place, someone, with all the nonchalance they can muster, says, "Hmmm...there are a lot of us here today. Maybe we should draw names for Christmas." As soon as we hear these words, we drop whatever we're doing, and the gift-giving draft begins.
I haven't been able to prove it, but I suspect Great-Grandma is the mastermind. I'm convinced she plants the idea and gets someone new to suggest it each year. When it comes to holidays, celebrations, and her family, the woman is wily. I like that about her.
We started this tradition years ago when we realized that none of us adults needed anything, and most of us were on a budget. We decided we would all continue to give gifts to the children in the family, but the adults would draw names. That way, each adult would receive one gift from the family, and we'd all save the strain on our wallets.
This year, something new happened. Aunt Judy had been holding on to a great idea for my father-in-law all year, but didn't draw his name, so she brokered a trade with my husband's sister.
"Hey! I didn't know we could swap!" I said.
"Well, why not?" Aunt Judy replied.
I had to agree — Why not, indeed!
Our sensible tradition has turned out to be even more fun than it is practical. The anticipation while waiting to see who will draw whose name can only be compared to, well, a kid waiting for Christmas.
We've also discovered that when we have to buy only one gift, we put a lot more thought into making it special. Last year, knowing how much I love to have parties, Great-Grandma gave me a three-in-one cake plate, punch bowl, and chip-and-dip server.
Our gift-giving draft is budget-friendly and fun, but most importantly, it helps us take the focus off things and place it on our family — which is just how Great-Grandma, and the rest of us, like it.
How do you handle gift-giving with a large family? Click the comments link below to find and share solutions.
Member Comments On…
Gift-Giving Draft
We used to do the exact same thing for our large family of adults, but even that became somewhat budget busting, so we came up with the idea to do a Yankee Swap instead. We have a limit of $25, and you have no idea who will receive your gift. Last year I gave the 12 days of Christmas as my gift. Modified of course. The 12th day was 12 hours of babysitting - we all appreciated that one, and the person who got this gift was envied by all.
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We also play the "game" where everyone draws a number: 1 picks a gift, 2 can steal or choose a new gift, and so on. However, the gifts are all gift cards. Every adult participates by purchasing one $25 gift card to a store of his or her choice. It's fun to watch the gift cards change hands several times during the game - and there's always some swapping after it's all said and done. Our only rule is no g.c. that would have to be "shared", i.e. restaurants or movie theaters - unless the recipient would be able to use the entire amount on him- or her-self at that establishment.
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This is actually a wonderful idea. I've been trying to implement this in my family for some time now but nobody wants to do it as they feel they must give a gift to everyone. I think it would be fair as everyone receives a gift. In fact, my idea was for each person to write their name on a piece of paper along with an idea of what they would like most and of course a dollar limit to the gift, say $50 or $100, this way no one would go over their budget and everyone would get a gift of the same value. But, as mentioned before, no one has taken to my offer yet. Next year is another year, hopefully this will work then as I too need a break in my wallet!
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I have 2 brothers, and all of us are married. We used to buy for everyone, then we started just buying for kids and drawing names for adults. It turned into telling someone EXACTLY what to buy or exchanging gift cards...not much fun! So this year we decided to draw names for the kids, and the three couples are going to go out for an evening (without kids) and have dinner, etc. The gift of time can be the greatest gift of all!
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We have a very large family, and we've done what we call "Kris Kringle", one for adults and one for kids. Where each adult picks another adults name, and where a couple or single adult pick one kids name, and buys them gifts. This year, we're trying the "white elephant" for the adults for something different, and because I've been trying to get everyone to draw names, but whenever we're together, we're having too much fun, we always forget! But, thanks to email, it should all work out!! Another tradition is that when it's a baby's first Christmas, we all get a gift for that baby, and this year we have 2 new babies!!!! We are blessed to have such a large family, and we spend a lot of time together, at the holidays, or at our monthly birthday celebrations, and at our yearly family reunion weekend, it's so much fun, and it's a gift in itself!
Anne Marie Culhane
Astoria, NY
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There are seven siblings in my family plus spouses. We started out with a gift exchange, there would be an adult gift exhange and a kid gift exchange. When the
kids starting getting older, they lost interest. We started doing family gifts, each family would get something for all the other families. It can be any price, it can be purchased, it can be made, it is was ever you want it to be. The gifts don't have to be the same for each family, but usually they are. The family gifts are always fun, they are always a surprise, you never know what you are getting. I have gotten gift baskets, serving trays, candles, Christmas dishes, lots of candy and gag gifts.
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On my in-laws side of the family, we all get together at my husband's aunts house, and we do a white elephant. Each adult brings a wrapped gift that cost $20 or less, and then we all sit around in a circle after the kids are done opening their gifts, and we all draw numbers. Whoever gets number one opens a gift first, and then it is number two's turn. Number two can then take number one's gift that they opened, or they can choose another one out of the pile. As the numbers get higher, you can steal any of the gifts that a smaller numbered person has opened, or take one off of the table. A gift can only be stolen three times, and after all of the number have gone, number one gets the opportunity to steal any of the gifts that they want. It is a great way to do gifts, and it is a lot of fun to see what people come up with! I now suggest doing this at any Christmas get together I go to, because the gifts are given annonomously, so you can be as silly or as serious as you want.
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In my family, we each give a $10 gift to each person. It really helps the wallet, and it is really fun to find a gift that you wouldn't buy for yourself, but that is a perfect item.
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My family (on my dad's side) used to draw names for everyone since we were such a huge family. Well, about five years ago, my aunt suggested a new tradition, and boy is it fun!! Now, everyone brings an UNtagged gift for every member of their family that comes with them that day (in other words-my family is a family of four-so four gifts). After Christmas brunch, everyone puts them on a big table and we draw numbers to see who goes first and so on. The first person picks up an item and the fun begins from there. The next person can either steal that gift or go for another package on the table. This goes on throughout the entire game, with each gift only being allowed to change hands three times. This has turned out to be a fun game and big family pastime on Christmas Day. It has made for great family memories!!!
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