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Fighting the Halloween Fear Factor
Rated by 4 members
"No, Mama. Too carry." (Translation: "Too scary.") I'll never forget Grace's little 2-year-old response as I prepped her for trick-or-treating.
She'd been Halloween-crazy until our neighbors began to show their serious spirit by pulling the skeletons from their closets and ghoulishly haunting the paths to their front doors.
When I explained it was all just pretend and promised to her hold her hand while trick-or-treating, she nodded with understanding. But just when I thought I was making headway, she shook her little head the other way and said, "'Til too carry. No tick-or-teeting."
We'd made the costume a month earlier — "Pee Pan" (Peter Pan) — and Grace was wearing it every day in anticipation. The dressing-up, the pumpkin-carving, the doorbell ringing, the candy — she was full-throttle Halloween until the dark side of the holiday began to eclipse the fun of it. I was disappointed that fear was going to make her miss out on fully celebrating one of my favorite holidays — I wait all year for those mini Snickers® bars.
On the eve of the big night, my pint-size Peter Pan marched into the living room and declared that our little dog, Buster, needed to dress up, too. I seized the opportunity and did a little negotiating. Would she at least try trick-or-treating if I made Buster a costume and he came with us? With Grace's agreement, some scraps from her homemade costume and a quick trip to the craft store, Buster was magically transformed into Tinkerbell, Peter Pan's sidekick.
The sun set on the big day, and I tried to hide my own nervousness for her as the Jack-o-Lanterns began to light the night with their eerie, toothless grins.
I consoled myself with that fact that at least she and Buster looked adorable together. As we marched up to the first of the scary houses in the neighborhood, Grace hesitated for only a moment, looked back at me and said, "Buster makes me feel brave." I was surprised and elated as she let go of my hand and confidently negotiated the path lined with illuminated skulls to ring the doorbell.
I don't know who got more goodies that night, Grace or Buster, but I got the best treat of all — even better than a Snickers® bar — seeing Peter Pan and Tinkerbell fearlessly conquer the night together.
Member Comments On…
Fighting the Halloween Fear Factor
this's great!!!
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Our family traditions include the secular celebrations of Halloween (jackolanterns), Christmas (Santa Claus), Easter (the bunny) with the religious being at the forefront. When our children were younger, we did the family celebrations at our church's festival - dress up and all! Then, we would trick-o-treat at a few select neighbors who knew we were coming. The girls have never known any fear to be associated with Halloween. Now, that they are older (7 and 11), they totally enjoy the neighborhood decor, have lots of giggles, and will have wonderful Halloween, family memories to treasure. Know your family, know your children's fear limits, and keep the scare away, but don't take the traditions away. They will never return. Great job on subsiding Grace's fears.
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This week my husband took a day off so we could take our 4 children to the dentist (it is definately a two person job!), afterwards it turned out to be a beautiful day so we went to a favorite park that is full of leaves, our children had so much fun celebrating Autumn. Tossing, piling & running through the leaves. They just love this time of year, all the beautiful colors of leaves. We don't do Halloween at all, not even a church party.
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We try not to expose our kids to the dark and scary side of Halloween. They don't need to be aware of that kind of fright at such a young age. (Their imaginations already come up with enough to spook them.) We attend a couple of Halloween-type activities in our community geared towards young children, and make it more of a fun, dress up holiday. We also attend a festival with our church where the kids can go trick-or-treating in a friendly, no-scare, atmosphere, and we try to focus on the Fall aspect of the season instead. One of my daughters has a birthday just before Halloween, so this year we're having a pumpkin party.
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We don't celebrate Halloween either.It's nice to know we are not the only ones.When my daugher was really young she was SCARED of Halloween, so bad to the point we had a very hard time going into WalMart.Now we stay home, make homemade pizza, hot wings, goodies (candy apples, etc) and turn the lights out and watch a movie as a family.It also saves us from all that candy that we never ate.
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We don't celebrate Halloween either and feel that forcing the kids to do something that scares them will only cause other problems in the long run. Instead, we celebrate Fall with a non-threatening festival at our church. We also go out to a family dinner on Halloween night. It is amazing how quickly we are seated and how attentive the staff is since everyone else is busy doing the trick-or-treat thing!
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We go to a local Church Harvest Festival. We don't celebrate halloween, but like to let our kids dress up and be in a friendly environment.
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This reminds me of the time I had the bright idea of letting my son--who loved dinosaurs at the time--watch Jurassic Park. I had forgotten how scary that movie was, and he was so scared we ended up watching the entire thing on fast-forward. The movie was over in about 15 minutes--before the popcorn was even gone! Great story--and what a great idea to bring "Tinkerbell" along for moral support!
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Our local mall offers trick or treating. That works out well to take anxious kids to a well-lit area to get their goodies. Some Nursing Homes also offer goodies, and the residents love to see the young kids. Just a few places without such scary decorations. My husband is guilty of scaring the little ones, including my daughter. It's nice to have other options!
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I was at the Halloween shop yesterday and heard a Mom and her son bickering over what he would be for Halloween. I know it gets harder when kids get older and are aware of brand names, but when they are little it's so much more fun to try something more original. Last night we made our own costumes for the first time! I don't sew but was thrilled to discover how far a little felt and a hot glue gun could go.
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