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Work Your Tail Off Until They Are In School
One of my mentors gave me this advice. My mentor, a wonderful woman named Tanya, advised me that I should do the following as far as balancing work and family:

"Work your tail off until your kids are school-age.  It's easier to find childcare when they are little and toddlers are a heck of a lot cuter than a pre-teen with an attitude.  If you work hard during the years when they are so sweet and so wonderful, you can buy yourself freedom for the time when the kids need you the most.  They need you more when they are older.  They might not want you as much but they need you more."

Tanya's theory on balancing work and family was that if a woman was able to keep her career going when the kids were younger then she could carve out a position of seniority or gain enough muscle to have more control over her schedule.

I followed this advice as I tried to balance work and family.  It was so hard to leave my sweet little toddlers and babies and work full time.  I would literally cry at my desk when I heard from the sitter about the milestones that my girls had without me.  I was the ONLY full time working mom in my daughter’s first grade class.  It was hard but I stayed on track.  I questioned myself a million times if I was doing the right thing by working full-time during the toddler and baby years.

I often felt like a fish out of water, as a mom, like I was one of the only ones working full time and that my kids were missing out. 

But as my girls got older, I noticed that many of the mothers were going back to work.  As my work schedule changed and slowed down, as I was able to do more during school hours for my daughters, more and more moms were adding part-time or full-time work to their lives. 

I am so glad that I worked more when the girls were young.  Being able to pick up the kids from school and talk to them about their day is the best part of my day.  I find out so much information just on the drive home.  Regarding my girls and "needing" me more now that they are older, I’ve found Tanya’s advice to be true.  The "tween" and teen years can be brutal for girls and I’m glad that I have been around more so that I can be there for them.  Sometimes they don’t WANT me around but that comes with the territory.
 
It’s hard to balance work and family.  I worked when the girls were very young and that allowed me to have more flexibility and credibility now that they are older.  There are too many women judging one another and I don’t want to add fuel to the "mommy wars" by declaring the way I did things as the "right" way to make motherhood and career work.