Dad on a Lark Blog
by Rand Richards Cooper
Lark (lärk): noun. 1. a carefree or spirited adventure. 2. a harmless prank
Dad on a Lark Blog
Lark (lärk): noun. 1. a carefree or spirited adventure. 2. a harmless prank
What She Can Do
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An old college friend, visiting the other weekend, mentioned that he'd
recently learned to play squash, and was having a blast at it. "How
often at our age," he asked, "do we get better at something?"
Too true! And could anything bring this home in a more humbling way
than having a 15-month-old daughter? Every day, it seems, a toddler can
do something new. Larkin is constantly learning things, perfecting
fledgling aptitudes and adding to her picture of the world. It is
relentless and awe-inspiring.
I remember the bit of advice we got most frequently when she was born:
"Enjoy it," friends said, "it goes so quickly!" Truth is, things don't
really go all that quickly with a newborn, because a newborn isn't
changing that fast. But at around 10 months or so, babies hit the
developmental accelerator and vroom, they're off. That's when it all begins to blur by. Hold on! you think. I just got used to the person you were yesterday!
You want to grab time and stop it.
You can't stop time, of course. But maybe you can slow it down a
little, by paying close attention to exactly where your child is today.
So here is a snapshot of Larkin at 15 months, and what she can do:
She waves goodbye. She growls in glee, a rasping Arrrrrhhhh!
uttered through a gaping smile. She points to pictures of turtles and
says "Durdoo." (She points to pictures of dogs and says "Durdoo.") She
plays hide and seek -- well, seek. She doesn't hide yet.
She can also:
Climb up the stairs -- but not down.
Say "Uff-Uff-Uff!" whenever she sees a dog.
Pull
up her shirt when you ask, "Where's your belly?" and place both hands
around her impressively large stomach while smiling proudly.
Open up a cell phone, press the buttons, hold it to the side of her head, and shout "Ya-waaoh!"
Fetch the appropriate object when you say "Larkin, would you please bring me that book/ shoe/ pine cone / newspaper?"
Accurately point to which of the three fabric nestling cups you have
put little pink "Mousie" under, even after you shuffle them around,
three-card-monty style.
Put a Cheerio in her mouth, then stick her tongue out with the Cheerio still on it while doing the Growl of Glee.
Remove a plastic organizer bin from the wooden rack in her room, place
it over her head, wait for you to ask "Where's Larkin?" -- then pull it
off her head and laugh hysterically.
Repeat the above 20 times in a row, until you are exhausted and mildly deranged.
Point again and again at objects of fascination around the house, like
the carved wooden eagle hanging on the landing wall, while pronouncing
"Ya bliggi wa lobbo bobbidy ya mayo!"
Take the miniature basketball, toddle down the hallway to the 30-inch high basket, hoist the ball over the rim and slam dunk it.
Climb up on the glass-topped coffee table and smear her fingerprints on it.
Take a paper towel and assiduously wipe down the glass-topped table she has just smeared.
Tear the paper towel very carefully into tiny strips, then hoard the
strips close to her chest, wander around the room, and return to clean
the glass-topped table again, wielding the handful of strips like an
impromptu dust rag.
Ransack an entire shelf of books in less than a minute, dumping them to the floor like a thief looking for hidden jewels.
Retrieve Eric Carle's Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See? from the pile when you call out its title, then bring the book to you and sit in your lap while you read it.
Stand behind the wooden cradle in the living room and rock it furiously
until it whomps loudly against the floor and threatens to tip over.
Go merrily wading through Bert the bulldog's water dish in the kitchen.
Sidle over to the standing floor lamp we have not figured out how to
childproof, loiter there until we say "No, Larkin," then proceed to
shake and tip it while grinning in mischievous transgression.
Smile her drop-dead-cute smile all morning, until Dad finally gets the camera -- then shift instantly into sulk-and-pout mode.
Time her poop for precisely three minutes after Dad has changed her pee-diaper.
Hurl a book/toy/sippy cup down the stairs and, as it goes, utter a worried and regretful "Uh-oh!"
Pull the plug on her little plastic bathtub-within-the-bathtub, and do
it again and again, no matter how often you plug it back in, and no
matter how often you demonstrate that unplugging it leads directly to
the unsatisfying result of an empty tub.
Dance to the Saturday morning radio polka program, with a herky-jerky,
shoulder-shrugging dance style resembling Elaine's egregious
performance on Seinfeld.
Reach up to the stereo console and turn the big volume knob WAY UP!!!
when her polka music comes on, then WAY UP AGAIN!! when we turn it
down, then shriek WAAAHHHH! in outrage when we intercept her on the way to do it a third time.
Resist every overture on the part of a lovesick parent, squirming away
from you, pushing herself out of your grasp, frowning at your kiss --
only to turn at an unexpected moment and come rushing at you, lunging
into your arms and nuzzling her face into yours, thereby administering
to you (just when you thought you wouldn't get it!) the daily dose of
euphoria that, if Pfizer or Merck could synthesize and market it
globally, would end all world conflict.
All that, and much more, too. When you gaze into the swift-running
stream of your toddler's development, so much of what you see is
marvelous and mysterious -- and especially, perhaps, in this last moment
before the arrival of language. What does Larkin see? What does it all
mean to her? Why those tiny strips of paper towel, for instance, that
she so carefully assembles and holds so close to her chest. What is she
thinking?
The mystery of toddler consciousness -- it's a topic for a novel, or at
least another column. But first I think I'll go learn squash, or
Spanish, or scrimshaw. Anything to keep up with that little girl.
Member Comments On...
What She Can Do
About Me
I began as a fiction writer (my first novel, "The Last to Go," was made into a really bad TV movie, starring Tyne Daly), then branched out to other writing. By now I've written for over 50 magazines, including "Glamour." "The New York Times Magazine," "Bon Appetit," and "Commonweal." Away from my writing desk, I'm a chess fanatic and hopeless basketball addict. Oh yeah, I'm also the family cook.
My next blog update: December 24, 2008
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Spanking is Bad. But What About Pinching?
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Schooled
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Hip Dude Finds Life after Basketball
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Parenting Books vs. Common Sense
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Life Lotteries - May 12, 2009
Girl of Steel
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Badtime Tales
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Being Clutch - March 3, 2009
The Great Pretender
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State of the Union
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Bridge to Nowhere
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Licensed to Chill - December 11, 2008
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Überparenting
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Conversational Dada - November 14, 2008
To Work, or Not to Work - November 14, 2008
Duplicating
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One and Done?
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Booked for Life - September 5, 2008
Up, Up and Away!
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A Girl with a Past
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Now & Then - June 11, 2008
Clothes Make the Girl
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No Longer an Option - May 14, 2008
Sock it To Me
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'Sploring! - April 16, 2008
Nurturing and Measuring - April 2, 2008
Unearthing
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The Failure - March 5, 2008
Scary Mysteries
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Joys of Cooking - February 7, 2008
Powering Down
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Chaos Theory - January 10, 2008
Out of Nowhere
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Being There - December 12, 2007
Aisle Take That
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Trial by Fever - November 14, 2007
Chopped Liver - November 1, 2007
I Am Woman
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She's So Smahhhht! - October 3, 2007
My Tree Thing
- October 17, 2007
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- September 24, 2007
Are We Relaxed Yet? - September 5, 2007
Tantrums - September 5, 2007
Those Little Blue Bags - September 5, 2007
The Dawning - September 5, 2007
Here We Go Again - September 5, 2007
Babyphiles and Babyphobes - September 5, 2007
Baby on Board! - September 5, 2007
The Monkey Wrench - September 5, 2007
The Princess and the Peas - September 5, 2007
What She Can Do - September 5, 2007
The Politics of Sleep - September 5, 2007
In My Mother's Shoes - September 5, 2007
The Ostrich
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Did We Forget Something?
- August 28, 2007


