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Since most of you don't truly know me, I will start this post simply. I lost my mother 15 1/2 years ago to cancer. It was horrible, and I miss her every day. We used to talk almost daily, and then she was gone. I still grieve for her,even after all of these years, and Mother's Day can be particularly hard. Though I have a family of my own now, I often wonder how my life would have been different if my girls had grown up with her in their lives. How I might have been different if her presence were still in my own.

My mother filled up a room upon her entrance. Not merely because of her stature, which was great at nearly five foot eleven. And not just due to her beauty, which was remarkable but not staggering. But through her very presence and her overwhelming list of achievements. Her very smile could light up the room. Ever a "bright side looker", Mom knew the power of positive thinking and brushed naysayers aside. That's not to say she wasn't ever critical. Especially of herself. Perfectionists are often their own worst critic, and Mom was no exception.

However, Mom's perfection taught me to do a job well. That is to say, she taught me that a job worth doing was worth doing well. Mom excelled at everything she did. She was an outstanding:

• Mother
• Wife
• Golfer
• Teacher (both of her own children and of students)
• Volunteer picture lady at the elementary school
• Great Books leader
• Bridge player
• Volunteer income tax return preparer for the disadvantaged
• Member of numerous boards across our city
• Fixer of EVERYTHING
  • Toilets
  • Garbage Disposer
  • Electrical Wiring (yes, really...)
  • Vacuum Cleaner
  • Things on the Car (To quote Mom: "Just listen to Frick and Frack on Saturdays on the radio!")
  • Costumes for Dance Recitals (so what if she used "Stitch Witch"?!)
  • Golf Clubs (Her uncle was the pro on the family course she grew up on...)
  • Any Appliance in the House (I'm not kidding.)
  • Leaky Faucets (Just read up on it in the Time Life book!)
• Lawn Mower (She mowed in her penny loafers and diamond necklace!)
• Check Book Balancer
• Financial Wizard

The only things that I remember my mother not doing exceptionally well were:

• Sewing (She passed this deficiency on to me...)
• Cooking (In this department, she knew what she knew, and that was that - no improvising for Mom!)
• Swimming (She'd have sunk like a rock if you'd dropped her in a lake)
• Telling Jokes (couldn't remember a punch line to SAVE HER LIFE...)

Oh, and occasionally, Mom was faulted for not sugar-coating things. She told it like it was. "You know, you've gained some weight. You might want to go up a size on those shorts." (ouch!) But at her memorial service (which was huge...) I had a minimum of five people say something to the effect of: "You know, you always knew where you stood with your mother. I loved that about her." Me, too.

Naturally, the older I get, the more I become like her in many ways. I can't remember the punch line to jokes to save my life...grrr. I'd sew the pocket on the outside of a pair of PJ pants before ever sewing it on correctly. BUT - I'm an excellent cook, a great swimmer and a pretty good mom. So, I guess in many ways, Mom's presence is still with me as my husband and I raise our daughters. And you know what? To quote an awesome mom (Jackie Kennedy) "If you bungle raising your children, I don't think whatever else you do well matters much."

So, to all you moms out there, keep up the great work. And if you've still got your own mommy, God bless you in your good fortune. And if, like me, your mom is already gone, God bless you on Mother's Day. May your memories of Mom serve to help make you a better mom yourself. I'll close this with Mom's favorite Irish blessing:

May the road rise up to meet you,

May the wind be always at your back.

May the sun shine warm upon your face

And rains fall upon your fields.

And until we meet again,

May God hold you in the palm of His hand.