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In recent weeks, I have found myself bombarded with numerous situations that have caused me to question the values of others and just what on earth they could possibly be thinking. These "others" range from adolescents all the way to older adults. I'm not saying that I'm doing the total superiority dance. No, not totally. But geez, what are some of these people thinking?

At the risk of hurting feelings and outing some people I actually care about, I won't go into details here. Rather, I will stick to the point I am at now, which is one of reflection. As parents, we all hope to impart some sort of wisdom upon our children. We hope to ingrain in them the things that we deem important, indeed even necessary, for them to lead a fruitful, fulfilling life. In attempting to impart this wisdom, my husband and I often find ourselves at odds with today's materialistic society.

Don't get me wrong. We, too are on the hamster wheel of materialism. Though we do not yet own them, I seem to be pining for:

• A large plasma television
• A bluetooth for my cell phone
• DVR or TIVO instead of the crummy taping system we currently use
• A newer (but preferably more fuel efficient), snappier car to tool around in (convertible, please...)
• A whole new kitchen, please (and make it larger...)
• A smaller stomach (OK, I won't kowtow to plastic surgery, but it would be nice...)

Yes, all of the above would be nice, but for now, I think I'll just ask for the Bluetooth for Mother's Day and call it good. My point here is that I've been seeing a lot of other people who will (seemingly?) do anything to get what they want -- at any cost. This is disturbing on so many levels.

With the children, I have to think that the apple doesn't fall from the tree. Cheaters, for example, breed cheaters, right? Or, at the very least, overbearing parents with unrealistic standards breed cheating children. Right? Try as I may to convince my kids that "cheaters never prosper", it's hard for them to do all the work necessary to achieve the A's the ethical way and then watch others skate by the cheater's way. We remind them that in the end, the kid who cheats knows inside that she cheated, and God knows that she cheated. This is  especially true with subjects like math; it will truly hurt her in the long run. Still, it's hard for the kids on the straight and narrow.

And the adults who seem to trample over those in their path to get what they want? Naturally, I have even less patience for them. It's all I can do to be in the same room with people like that. As adults, we tell ourselves that "they'll get theirs in the end," "Karma will win out," etc.

But you know what? Outside of my marriage, the single most important possession I have is my character. And that's really all I need to know. And as my kids get older (now 13 and 16), they're really beginning to get that, too. Integrity is central to good character. They go hand in hand. You can't have one without the other.

I leave you with a couple of my favorite quotes on this topic:

The best index to a person’s character is (a) how he treats people who can’t do him any good, and (b) how he treats people who can’t fight back. 
— Abigail van Buren (Pauline Esther Friedman), American newspaper advice columnist (1918-2002)

Good character is more to be praised than outstanding talent. Most talents are, to some extent, a gift. Good character, by contrast, is not given to us. We have to build it piece by piece -- by thought, choice, courage and determination.

— John Luther