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As I drove up the driveway to our apartment's parking lot, I noticed our neighbor standing outside of her van with the side door open.  She was just sort of lingering there with a tired, puzzled look on her face.  As I parked my car, I noticed that her baby was asleep in her car seat.

I looked over at my neighbor, who said, "Well, I'm just trying to figure out what to do, whether I should wake her up or just stand here and let her sleep more."

I could relate with her completely; the scene brought back a rush of memories of similar moments with our girls.  There are always all these "ifs," and figuring out what to do with the sleeping babies had everything to do with how tired we were.

If we picked them up, they probably wouldn't stay asleep.  If we picked them up, they might stay asleep, allowing us a minute to run in and pee or something.  If we picked them up and they woke up, they would probably be grouchy (very).  If we didn't pick them up and let them sleep in the car, then we were trapped there, waiting at the car, goodness knows how long.  But, even a moment standing around next to the car was a peaceful moment, however awkward. If we let them sleep though, then they wouldn't be able to get to sleep tonight.

These are not earth-shattering decisions, to be sure.  They are just the day-to-day minutiae of taking care of babies, yet I remember my husband and I seriously discussing what to do in these instances.

Now that our girls are just about four years old, these moments seem so cute, so long ago, especially since we are in the throes of such "big girl" dilemmas like the end of potty training and lessons about how to use words instead of hits.

And I know from listening to my friends with older kids, kids in elementary school, kids in high school, kids in college, that there are classic day-to-day decisions to face at each stage.  The decisions seem to carry more weight as kids get older -- it seems like it's harder to navigate all the different aspects of a child's life: social, emotional, academic, and with twins, the ever-important element of individuating self from sibling.

Today, in the parking lot, made me aware of the passage of time, of my girls growing older, even as little as they still are.