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Today Alexander had a no good, very bad day, although it didn't start off that way.  He seemed to be fine in the morning before school and was in a chipper mood when I picked him up.  Then we had some friends over and he turned into a complete bully.  His friend Joshua is a little younger than him and I think Alex tends to be the one in charge when they play together.  (Now that I think about it, though, I'm pretty sure Alex is almost always the one in charge no matter who he plays with.)

At one point, I was in the house with Joshua's mom and our two babies and I looked out to see that Joshua had fallen down and my boy, my boy who is usually kind and fun-loving, kicked his friend in the head with his rain boot.

I know!!!

I was horrified and immediately ran out to the back of the yard to comfort Joshua and punish Alex.  Fortunately Joshua was okay after a few minutes, but I still have no idea what Alex was thinking or what lead up to that moment to make him think that was appropriate behavior.  I gave the child a piece of my mind.  He apologized and the two boys eventually went back to playing.  In hindsight, I should've spanked Alex right there and then because it might have prevented what happened next:

About half an hour later, he HIT Joshua in the face, this time with his hand, possibly because he wanted whatever toy it was that Joshua was holding.

As if that wasn't bad enough, this time he LIED about it too.  I had to threaten him with worse punishment in order to get him to fess up to hitting his friend.  I was totally beside myself when it happened and since neither parent had seen the offense, I waited until I was sure of what had happened before dragging Alex into the house and tanning his hide.  I spanked him and then made him sit in the office by himself for over twenty minutes before allowing him to come out and make nice. 

In our house we spank for only two reasons: intentionally hurting another person or an animal (our dog has oft been on the receiving end of some pretty horrible treatment from Alex).  Kicking and then hitting a friend certainly rose to the occasion of a spanking, so I know that if nothing else, at least I was consistent with our rules. 

The part that's bothering me is why he would act this way in the first place.  Especially lately, when both his father and I have noticed a new level of maturity, I was completely surprised that he would act out in this way.  I won't go so far as to say it was out of character for him, but it was more like his character circa age two, not four.  I have no idea what's going on with him, but I'm seriously on high alert right now.  I feel SO BAD that my child hurt Joshua, his closest friend.  The last thing I want my child to become is a bully.