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Alex grates nutmeg in the classroom

We've had Alex, our four-year-old, in a Montessori preschool for the last seven months.  I'm sure I mentioned it, but we've decided to take him out of school at the end of this month simply for financial reasons.  At $500 per month, it's breaking the bank.

Today his class held a "showcase" in which the parents were invited to observe the children doing their Montessori work.  It was very low key and Alex ended up demonstrating five of the tasks/jobs/stations he's learned at school this year.  Today he picked:
- Nutmeg grating (which is exactly what it sounds like)
- A puzzle map (of Africa, which was so difficult, even for me, that he barely even touched it)
- Cutting patterns with scissors (which he's been able to do for over a year)
- Tracing an octagon shape and then coloring it in (easy for a child who likes to color in bulldozers)
- Juicing an orange (which technically he wasn't supposed to show me because apparently he'd never done it before)

As much as I feel like I've seen major progress in my son, I was, sadly, unimpressed today.  I'm not sure if he just decided to show me his favorite activities at school or if these are the only activities he DOES, but I know he's capable of more.  I was disappointed that of all the things he wanted to show me, none was academic.  As I looked around the classroom at the other kids learning addition by counting cool strings of beads and learning to read with chunky plastic letters they use to form words, I was more than a little bummed that my kid wasn't doing that stuff.  I know some of those kids are older than Alex (he's in a classroom of 3 to 6-year-olds), but I didn't get the impression that anyone has been encouraging Alex to pursue the more intellectual materials.  The more I think about it, I'm coming to the realization that this philosophy might not be all that well suited to his personality and abilities.

I think Alex does well when they're peer competition.  When he was grating nutmeg today, he kept saying how he was going to grate more nutmeg than anyone ever had!  that it was going to fill up the entire classroom!  If reading was something the entire class did AT THE SAME TIME, I think Alex would want to learn more just so he could outdo his classmates.  Not all children thrive under competition, but Alex would certainly benefit from it at this age.  Because all the children in a Montessori classroom are busy doing their own individual projects, he rarely gets the benefit of that peer encouragement.  And he's so concerned with what he's doing himself that he's not noticing that the other kids are busy counting beads.

I also feel left out of the classroom.  Montessori parents are encouraged to stay away as much as possible, which is a philosophy I fully understand.  Having parents around often makes kids needy and disobedient.  I get that.  But I really miss the days when I used to pick Alex up from his old school and I'd get a full rundown of EXACTLY what he did for the four hours he was gone all day.  I don't get that from his current school.  I especially feel left out on days like St. Patrick's Day when I'm not invited to the class parties.  I can't even take any pictures.

There are definitely some good things too!  The biggest thing I've noticed about Alex since he's been in this program is a huge surge in his independence.  He dresses himself independently and enthusiastically wants to do as much as he can without help.  Before he started at this school, I was dressing him and brushing his teeth and washing his hands and setting the table and now he does all that himself.  He actually WANTS to, which is even better.  I just think that the same things that make this program great don't necessarily work for all children.  I just know if he was in a more traditional classroom setting, he'd have been reading a long time ago.  He's been ready and on the verge of it for months now, but without that encouragement, some gentle nudging, it's not happening. I have a kid who would always rather play than work and with the Montessori philosophy that's cool, even if it's not always cool with me.