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On Monday, The Boy came home from school and said, "I have no homework!"

Skeptical, I asked him how his memorization of a poem for Friday's Speech Meet was going.

He immediately went into defensive mode. "I'm never going to be able to learn it. It's stupid. Why should I have to remember some dumb poem?"

I was like, "Dude. It's your responsibility to do all of your school work. Plus, you rocked it last year - why wouldn't you want to do that again?"

"It's too hard!" he exclaimed.

"Too bad, let's do it," I said.

So we practiced - every night until Friday. Friday on the way to school, he recited it with just one tiny flaw. I explained what he did wrong, but said that all the rest was perfect.

And Friday afternoon, The Boy's teacher called me to let me know he was one of the classroom winners. Fortunately, I was planning to pick him up early for school, so I was able to be there for the awards ceremony (he didn't know he won yet).

The school gave all participants an award - but recognized those who did a superior job. I liked that - it shows children that there are winners and losers in life, but we all get recognized for trying.

I watched, though, as children burst into tears and pouted their way onto the stage to receive the participation award. They knew they hadn't won, and they didn't know how to handle that.

When The Boy wasn't called in the first group of children to receive his award, he knew he had won. His face lit up and he began bouncing in his seat. I leaned over and said, "I know you're happy, but be respectful of your friends who didn't receive the same award you're going to."

His face grew serious as he told me I was right. "But I'm just so happy!" he said. I said, "Yeah, but you don't want your friends to feel bad. Be humble and respectful. This time, you won; but remember the spelling bee, how you felt when you didn't win?"

I knew he remembered how he was brought to tears, getting out in the first round.

After he received his Speech Meet award, he noticed one of his friends crying in his seat. He walked over to him and put his hand on the friend's arm. I couldn't hear what he was saying; honestly, I doubt it was very soothing. After all, my kid is just seven, and they're not known for being particularly sensitive. But I was proud of him anyway. Instead of gloating and prancing around with his red ribbon, compared to his classmates' white, he tried to comfort a friend.

When we got in the car to go home, I reminded him there's a downside to getting the "excellent" award. "What's that?" he asked.

"Now you have to do your poem in front of the whole school assembly next week!" I said. "The other kids get to forget theirs; you still have to practice!"

He groaned. "Oh no!"

Oh yes. There are prices to pay for winning, too. But winning is such a great opportunity to teach children how to be humble and gracious - just as much as losing.