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My son the chef

When The Boy was born, I was all about the books. He would make the slightest noise, and I'd try to look up in every parenting book I had what it could possibly mean.

Eventually I learned to trust my own intuition and put the manuals away. I think they only served to freak me out, anyway.

So for the past five years or so, I haven't thought about what is age-appropriate for a seven-year-old. I think about what is appropriate for MY seven-year-old. And one of the things I let him do is cook.

We started by baking together. I would read him ingredient lists, and he would find the ingredients, search the measuring cups for the right size, and make a huge mess pouring flour and sugar all over my kitchen. That's part of it: not flipping out over the mess.

He wanted to know what buttons to press on the oven. Before he could read, I would tell him what letters to look for; now I tell him the words and numbers.

One day, we were in the grocery store and he was begging me to buy a cake mix and frosting. I said, "Tell you what. You can get that stuff IF you read the directions and bake it yourself. I'll just supervise."

He's a smart kid, but he's not really interested in reading. But for cake...he'll pretty much do anything! He read every word on the package and baked that cake all by himself.

Recently, I've gotten completely sick of him complaining about not wanting to eat whatever I cook for dinner. So I've started saying, "Fine. You can cook your own dinner. What do you want?"

The first thing he learned to make was a quesadilla - and this was his first foray into using the stovetop! I grew up with an electric stove, but now we have gas. For me, it was a scary transition - just seeing those flames made me nervous. But eventually kids have to learn to be responsible - and I know my kid. He'll follow my instructions and remember what I say.

He got out a frying pan and non-stick cooking spray. I explained how we can never spray a can near an open flame, so the first thing is to spray the pan over the sink, then bring it over to the stove. Once it was on the stovetop, he could turn the burner on medium.

I helped him gather all his ingredients and a spatula. He placed a tortilla in the frying pan, then covered it with cheese. Once the cheese began to melt, I showed him how to use the spatula to peek at the bottom of the tortilla to see if it was getting brown. It was, so I then showed him how to hold the frying pan handle with one hand while folding the tortilla with the spatula. This was definitely the hardest part for him, but he got it.

After another minute, I told him to flip the folded tortilla to its other side. It slid around the pan a bit and threatened to jump out, but he got it under control. He turned off the stove and plopped the quesadilla on a plate.

He tells me this was the most delicious dinner he ever ate...and when he finished it, he asked if he could make another. And then when he finished his second, he actually made a third. I think it was more the thrill of cooking something than actually being hungry, but I wanted to encourage his interest so I let him eat as much as he wanted.

I'm pretty sure he's the only kid in his class that gets to use the stove (with supervision, of course; and he knows not to touch it if I'm not around). And frankly, I think that's too bad. When I was a kid (though not quite as young), it was my responsibility to cook dinner for my family. My single mom was exhausted when she got home from work, and this was a chore I enjoyed. Nowadays, it seems we protect our children from so much and we don't always teach them these practical skills - cooking, washing dishes, doing laundry - that eventually they will need. Sure, we might get a piece of eggshell in our cookies once in a while. But that's all part of learning and growing, isn't it?