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Every year, millions of Americans declare that January 1st will be the day their lives will change. But whether the goal is to lose weight, quit smoking or organize some area of their lives, only half of those with resolutions will make it six months and just 10% will still be on track a year later.  Most won't even make it a week.

Why?

Because for every goal we make, there's a business out there looking to make a buck on our weakness. My suggestion: Don't drop a dime on your new life before first knowing what your goals really are and how to achieve them. Long term success isn't about quitting cold turkey and becoming a "perfect" version of yourself (don't we wish?). The only way to change any negative behavior is to replace it with a new behavior.

Here's how...

Stay Positive: Let's take weight loss, shall we? Companies that bombard us with promises of rapid fat loss and gravity-defying bodies know a thing or two about marketing with positive images. There's a reason before and after photos next to the headline "Lose 25 pounds by Valentine's Day!" sucks people in. It's all about the results.

Yet most of us start the journey to weight loss already set up to fail. Negative self talk (like: "I'm fat and have to lose weight") pretty much guarantees you'll hit the cheesecake the first time you're faced with a hurdle.

Try to focus instead on what you're working toward.

I am on my way to a stronger, healthier me.

Write it down: Keeping track of your goals, successes and obstacles in a notebook is a highly effective way to identify problem areas and strengths; set a series of small goals and keep a record of the rewards you want and what it takes to get them.

Make Small Changes: Every positive choice you make, however small, is one step closer to your goal.

•Are you drinking wine every night of the week? At 120 calories for a six ounce glass, that can add up pretty quickly. Start by committing to cut the wine consumption in half. Waking up refreshed and ready to take on the day can be a fantastic motivator to take it a step further.
•Are you picking up the leftovers the kids leave behind? Commit to only eating while sitting at the table. You'll quickly see how many empty calories you can save.
•Are you hitting the pantry late night? Call a friend when you're feeling tempted or actually hit the sack and get that 8 hours you've only dreamed of.

Now you're ready for more! The more of these small, manageable goals you achieve each week, the better you'll feel about yourself and the longer you'll stick to a new way of life.

A few bite-sized goals:

• 30 minutes of exercise
• 8 glasses of water each day
• Smarter choices when eating out; protein, fruits and vegetables
• Eat a good breakfast
• Park further away from destination
• Take the stairs
• Go for a walk / dance / or play a sport with the kids
• [Insert your goal]

Now, let's talk about organization. Getting out of debt is a popular resolution. But that certainly doesn't happen overnight. Resolve to take the first steps...

• Write down every penny you spend for a month. Seeing where you're spending can help you cut out things you don't need and prioritize for those you do.
• Go a month without incurring late or overdraft fees
• Set small goals: Do you spend 20 bucks a week on skinny half-caf mocha lattes? There are cheap and easy ways to make the same thing at home or even at the office. Going homemade - even half the time - will save you hundreds over the course of a year.

If you're anything like me, you have dreams of being that uber-organized everything-in-its-place person one day.  But who am I kidding? The site of my messy car or the pile of papers that need to be filed sends me into a tizzy. So instead of setting unattainable goals, l'm choosing to focus on the small stuff that will help me feel more in control of my life like...

• Cleaning the smushed up Goldfish from under the car seats
• Spending ten minutes a day on the pile of papers on the counter
• Tossing out / giving away toys the kids haven't played with in two years
• Saying "no" to activities and appointments that don't benefit my family (including me)
• Challenging myself to get through one week not putting off assignments and tasks until the last minute

Because like a runner or swimmer who tries to beat his own time, we can use each day, week (or even hour) as a challenge to improve our lives. And while you might hit some hurdles, the race for self-improvement is only over if you give up trying.

Jackie Morgan MacDougall is a TV-executive turned parenting blogger who lives a crazy life with her husband and three small kids. Her dreams of climbing the corporate ladder have been replaced by the dream of one day having a nap. You can find more of her musings at The Silver Whining.

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