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Supernanny Jo Frost shares some parenting tips.

Posted October 8, 2008 by Tommi Lewis Tilden with Tori Weber

British child behavior expert (and former nanny) Jo Frost has been likened to a "modern-day Mary Poppins" and has three best-selling parenting books under her umbrella to prove it. The star of ABC’s Supernanny is the salve for any pained parent looking to alleviate family turmoil, bickering, back talking, and more.

Since not every family will have the opportunity to watch the Nanny sedan roll into their driveway, we are saving Supernanny some petrol -- and you some stress!  We took a "time out" with the child whisperer and learned some invaluable parenting tips.

Deal with small problems before they become big problems
If your 8-year-old is regularly throwing things, it’s only going to get worse if you don’t address the problem now, and he will have better aim as he gets older.  In season five’s premiere of Supernanny, the Quinn family needed Jo’s help with a 14-year-old boy who hit his siblings.  Supernanny says these are problems that start much earlier than the teenage years.  "It certainly happens over time.  In this case, you’re seeing progressive anger that’s been built up over time."  Jo says parents need to find out where the anger is coming from. "I don’t think it’s something parents intentionally create; it’s more about learning how to deal with the situation when it’s beginning.  And that happens with truth, honesty, and relationship building. Parents need to create more open conversation with their kids, make it so they allow their kids to feel comfortable talking to them. When you magnify a problem rather than deal with it, it creates fear."

Don’t be afraid to ask for help
"Sometimes it’s necessary to bring someone in who is an expert, such as for a child with autism," says Jo.  If you feel your child’s needs are becoming more than you can handle, don’t be afraid to ask a doctor or therapist for guidance.  "Raising children with special needs can be extremely challenging, whether it’s ADHD, autism, or Down syndrome." Supernanny says she has helped families get a support system.  "It depends on what the special need is. I make sure there’s a system in place. I try to alleviate the strain on the family. If they’ve come to me, they’re in a pickle already so I look for ways to take the strain away so they can enjoy where they’re at."

Play with your kids -- but encourage them to play on their own
Play time is an important way to bond with your children, but there is nothing wrong with also teaching them to play by themselves. "It’s about encouraging children to participate in activities you like, and also giving them the space to learn and play on their own," Jo advises.  Plus, it will help give you a few minutes to make dinner -- or finally get to go to the bathroom.

Television is okay -- in moderation
Television can be fun and educational, but if your kids can recite episodes of Gossip Girl or 30 Rock, it may be time for some changes.  "My main concern is making sure TV is responsible, with respect to network shows, it’s very impressionable," Jo says.  "I work with families on restricting TV time so it doesn’t become the techno nanny.  TV is a large part of American culture and fortunately there are good shows, but overall it’s about being sensible and monitoring what they watch and for how long."

Potty training is different for each child
Don’t stress out if your 3-year-old isn’t potty trained yet just because your first-born had the hang of it by two and a half.  You don’t have to resort to lining the living room with newspaper; it’s okay to go back to diapers for now.  Jo says it is important to recognize that all kids are different when it comes to potty training -- and the differences extend beyond boys versus girls.  "I’m always looking at the development of the child, for instance whether they take afternoon naps, or I’ll assess their speech development. There’s a time when it all connects and comes together.  I think using things like pull-ups can be very confusing. They are like underwear but are really a diaper.  I don’t train that way, they either wear diapers or underwear."

Trust yourself
As the author of How to Get the Best From Your Children, Jo says the key to good parenting is learning to trust yourself. "My books are always encouraging parents to listen, trust their own voice. It’s important to encourage parents to build their confidence. Common sense, making decisions, good communication, it’s a whole process. You get better each month."

Watch Supernanny Fridays at 9:00 p.m. EST on ABC.