Dalai Mama Dishes
Catherine Newman cooks for the family
Birdy Longstocking
1 |
Ever wonder what Catherine sounds like? Listen to her read this blog entry.
It's easy for me to forget that the children don't always have all the information they need. Information so as not to make choices that send me Thelma and Louiseing myself into a canyon. Tonight, for instance. Michael's working, so the kids and I have upholstered ourselves to the big bed, all of us bundled down together for the duration, to write in our journals and read our stories and love each other up and drive each other crazy. Michael's the one who's been reading Pippi Longstocking to Birdy, and so when the bookmark falls out - Birdy tugs it loose and then says, "Wait - where does this go?" - I'm not sure where to start. Birdy remembers something about a circus, so I find the chapter, try to determine if they got all the way through it. "'Oh what a jolly horse,' cried Pippi," I read, and Birdy taps her chin and nods slowly: "Yup. Read that already. "Oops," Ben says on my other side, and I see that his pen has slipped and he's drawn a black line across our white comforter cover; he smears it around with his licked thumb, while simultaneously drawing on it some more with the pen that's now capped on its back end. "Oops," he says again, and shoots me his patented comical worried expression, eyes stretched wide as dinner plates. I pat Ben's knee, ask Birdy, "Did she fight Mighty Adolf yet?" and she says, "She did." I show her the first page of the next chapter, "Pippi Entertains Two Burglars." "That," she says. "Definitely. Start there."
An awful distraction is buzzing in my head because I've left myself tons of work tonight, and I just want the children to be asleep already so I can stay awake long enough to do it. Lists form and reform even as I'm reading aloud about the madcap goings on at Villa Villekulla. I have a rich and beautiful life and I enjoy it so much - but times like this, I need a bumper sticker that says, "Life Is Not a Squeaky Hamster Wheel Atop Pee-Soaked Cedar Shavings." And so, when I look at Birdy three pages into the chapter and she's got her hands clamped down tight over her ears, I am not a happy hamster. "Honey," I say, only I have to press my face up against hers so she can see that I'm talking to her. "WHAT'S UP?" "Well," she says, and her eyebrows lift apologetically, "Daddy actually did read that already? And I didn't want to hear it again."
Hm.
"So you thought you'd just plug up your ears and let me go ahead and read it anyways?" I say, and even Birdy can hear that this is something of a rhetorical question. "That wasn't a very good idea," she says with nervous, curtsying obedience, like I'm Miss Hannigan and Birdy splits her time between singing "Maybe," and dreaming of the nice family who might one day adopt her. "Honey," I say to Birdy, but I don't know what to say next. I poke Ben, who's writing in his journal about the salmon hatching in his second-grade classroom. "Ben!" I say, loudly now. "Ben! Help me! I've run out of patience! It's all drained away!" Ben snaps into action, flinging his journal aside to turn his finger into a syringe that he jabs into my biceps. "Patience!" he cries. "Coming right up! Hang on!" He pantomimes refilling and jabs me again, then my eyes roll up into my head and I fall back onto the pillows in a blessed-out stupor of patience and say, "Phew!" How I managed before this crazy, funny, big-hearted kid came into my life is totally beyond me.
"Honey," I say again to Birdy, whose face is pink and soft again from laughing, "it's frustrating to read to someone who isn't listening." "I understand," she says simply. "I'm sorry. I think it's after her feet are sticking up out of the covers like this?" She dives under the comforter, and sticks her stripy socks up into the air in such an excellent imitation of Miss Longstocking herself that Ben and I crack up when we find the picture in the book: "Here?" I say, and she says, "Definitely." "Tommy's and Annika's mother had invited a few ladies to a coffee party," I read, and Birdy's face creases with worry. "Actually?" she says, "I think we already read that part." Ben jabs me again with his finger of patience - and it's not a moment too soon.
Member Comments On...
Birdy Longstocking
About Catherine Newman
Catherine Newman is the author of the
memoir, Waiting for Birdy: A Year of Frantic Tedium,
Neurotic Angst, and the Wild Magic of Growing a Family, available
online and in bookstores nationwide.
- March 2011
-
- March 21, 2011
Gratitude - March 14, 2011
Mexican Rice - March 7, 2011
Brown-butter Whole-wheat Shortbread
- March 21, 2011
- February 2011
-
- February 28, 2011
Smoky Saucy Chickpeas with Spinach - February 20, 2011
Roast Chicken with Ginger Vinaigrette - February 14, 2011
Butternut Galette - February 7, 2011
Beets
- February 28, 2011
- January 2011
-
- January 31, 2011
Brownies - January 24, 2011
The World's Best Salad (and how to teach your kid to make it) - January 18, 2011
Rosemary-Parmesan Butternut Gratin - January 10, 2011
Friendly Fondue - January 3, 2011
Yeasted Waffles
- January 31, 2011
- December 2010
-
- December 27, 2010
Ham and Cheese Muffins - December 19, 2010
Chile Tortilla Eggbake - December 13, 2010
Peppermint Patties - December 6, 2010
Maple Rosemary Popcorn
- December 27, 2010
- November 2010
-
- November 29, 2010
Jalapeno-Cheddar Potato Fritters - November 22, 2010
Caramelized Brussels Sprouts - November 15, 2010
Sparkling Cranberry Centerpiece - November 8, 2010
Whole-wheat Pasta with Broccoli Pesto and Garlicky Breadcrumbs - November 1, 2010
Fancy Pastries
- November 29, 2010
- October 2010
-
- October 25, 2010
Apple Pie Tutorial - October 18, 2010
Lentil Soup - October 9, 2010
Pork Roast with Cider-Cream Gravy - October 4, 2010
Kale Chips
- October 25, 2010
- September 2010
-
- September 27, 2010
Potato Leek Soup - September 20, 2010
Panzanella - September 13, 2010
Iced Oatmeal Cookies - September 6, 2010
Pizza
- September 27, 2010
- August 2010
-
- August 30, 2010
One-Bean Salad - August 23, 2010
Tomatoes, Basil, and Mozzarella - August 16, 2010
Mexican Chicken Salad - August 9, 2010
Pesto
- August 30, 2010
- July 2010
-
- July 31, 2010
Cherry-Apricot Crumble - July 26, 2010
Summer Pasta with Corn, Lime, and Cream - July 19, 2010
The World's Best (and Easiest) Dill Pickles - July 9, 2010
Panna Cotta - July 5, 2010
Gingery Napa Slaw
- July 31, 2010
- June 2010
-
- June 27, 2010
Cold Noodle Bowl - June 21, 2010
Chimichurri - June 14, 2010
Burger Buns - June 7, 2010
Satiny Chocolate Sauce
- June 27, 2010
- May 2010
-
- May 31, 2010
Green Goddess Potato Salad - May 24, 2010
Polenta with Butter-Braised Asparagus - May 17, 2010
Tortillas from Scratch - May 10, 2010
Beef Satay with Peanut Sauce - May 3, 2010
Smoky Shrimp with Garlic and Olive Oil
- May 31, 2010
- April 2010
-
- April 26, 2010
Raw Energy Bars - April 19, 2010
Saturated Pork Chops - April 12, 2010
Chocolate Chip Cookies - April 5, 2010
Devilish Eggs
- April 26, 2010
- March 2010
-
- March 29, 2010
Toffee Buttercrunch Matzoh - March 21, 2010
*Fish* with Brown Butter Sauce - March 15, 2010
Thai Coconut Chicken Soup - March 8, 2010
Headlong into Spring (i.e. Asparagus with Brown Butter Sauce) - March 1, 2010
Corn, Bean, and Barley Soup
- March 29, 2010
- February 2010
-
- February 21, 2010
Soft Pretzels - February 15, 2010
Winter Blues - February 8, 2010
Empanadas - February 1, 2010
Walnut-Orange Cake
- February 21, 2010
- January 2010
-
- January 25, 2010
Lemon-Herb Roast Chicken - January 18, 2010
Amazing From-Scratch Hot Chocolate - January 11, 2010
Pork So Good It Could Make You Cry - January 4, 2010
Winter Sunshine Bars
- January 25, 2010
- December 2009
-
- December 28, 2009
Fantastic Fearless Five-Minute Bread - December 21, 2009
Brown Beef Stew - December 14, 2009
Never Enough Latkes - December 7, 2009
Eggnog Cheesecake Squares
- December 28, 2009
- November 2009
-
- November 30, 2009
Kale Slaw - November 23, 2009
Cranberry Sauce - November 16, 2009
Birthday Cake - November 12, 2009
Instant Oatmeal - November 2, 2009
Roasted Cauliflower Salad
- November 30, 2009
- October 2009
-
- October 26, 2009
Crunchy Oven Fries - October 19, 2009
Homemade Fancy Crackers - October 5, 2009
The Soup of 1000 Vegetables
- October 26, 2009
- September 2009
-
- September 28, 2009
Granola Bars - September 21, 2009
Dad's Spaghetti Sauce - September 14, 2009
Peachy Peach Jam - September 8, 2009
Two Late Summer Dips
- September 28, 2009
- August 2009
-
- August 31, 2009
Chocolate Zucchini Cupcakes - August 22, 2009
Minted Cherry Tabouli - August 17, 2009
Easy Roasted Tomato Sauce - August 10, 2009
Double-Delicious Grilled Chicken - August 3, 2009
Camping and Eating
- August 31, 2009
- July 2009
-
- July 25, 2009
Warm and Smoky Potato Salad - July 16, 2009
Make Your Own (Quinoa!) Sundaes - July 7, 2009
Mango Fro-yo Pops
- July 25, 2009
- June 2009
-
- June 29, 2009
Asian-style Chicken Salad - June 22, 2009
Best Buttermilk Dressing - June 15, 2009
Donut Cake - June 8, 2009
Finger-licking Ribs - June 1, 2009
Hummus Among Us
- June 29, 2009
- May 2009
-
- May 26, 2009
Banana Muffins - May 18, 2009
Rhubarb Crumb Bars - May 11, 2009
Hakuna Frittata - May 4, 2009
Asparagus with Delicious Dip
- May 26, 2009
- April 2009
-
- April 27, 2009
Roasted Salmon with Ginger-Cilantro Vinaigrette - April 20, 2009
Chocolate Pudding - April 13, 2009
Whole-wheat Pasta with Chickpeas and Lemon - April 8, 2009
Matzo Brei - April 6, 2009
Migas
- April 27, 2009
- March 2009
-
- March 30, 2009
Macaroni and Cheese - March 23, 2009
Yummy Buttermilk Biscuits - March 16, 2009
Perfect Oatmeal Cookies - March 9, 2009
Soy-Braised Chicken - March 2, 2009
Roasted Chickpea Snacks
- March 30, 2009
- February 2009
-
- February 23, 2009
Buttermilk Pancakes - February 15, 2009
Basic Sautéed Chicken - February 9, 2009
Chocolate Cake - February 2, 2009
Black Bean Dip - February 1, 2009
Football Gameday Snacking
- February 23, 2009
- January 2009
-
- January 26, 2009
Tamale Pie - January 20, 2009
Borscht - January 12, 2009
Baked Pancake - January 5, 2009
Corn Chowder
- January 26, 2009
- December 2008
-
- December 29, 2008
Egg Noodles with Ham and Peas - December 20, 2008
Maple Snow Taffy - December 15, 2008
Dinner Beans - December 8, 2008
Vanilla Extract - December 1, 2008
Carrot Salad
- December 29, 2008
- November 2008
-
- November 24, 2008
Cranberry Upside-Down Cake - November 17, 2008
Crudités - November 10, 2008
Gingerbread - November 3, 2008
Tofu P.S. - November 3, 2008
Soy-Glazed Tofu
- November 24, 2008
- October 2008
-
- October 27, 2008
Granola - October 20, 2008
Pot Roast - October 13, 2008
Plum Cake - October 13, 2008
It's Not Good-bye It's Bon Appetit! - October 6, 2008
Forty - October 2, 2008
Pants and Undies that Fall Down Every Five Minutes, Part II
- October 27, 2008
- September 2008
-
- September 22, 2008
Pants and Undies that Fall Down Every Five Minutes - September 16, 2008
Growing Up - September 9, 2008
Great Things - September 5, 2008
Thunderstorms
- September 22, 2008
- August 2008
-
- August 26, 2008
Babies - August 19, 2008
The Road at Nickerson Campground - August 19, 2008
Summer Fever - August 6, 2008
Aswim
- August 26, 2008
- July 2008
-
- July 29, 2008
Honestly - July 15, 2008
Chilling Out - July 8, 2008
Buckets of Rain
- July 29, 2008
- June 2008
-
- June 30, 2008
The Life - June 24, 2008
Heat Wave - June 16, 2008
Lady Liberty - June 9, 2008
Bleeding Heart - June 4, 2008
The Mostly Giving Tree
- June 30, 2008
- May 2008
-
- May 27, 2008
Taboo - May 19, 2008
Tooth, Wisdom - May 13, 2008
Bedfellows - May 6, 2008
Natural Talent
- May 27, 2008
- April 2008
-
- April 29, 2008
Adjustable Rate Mothering - April 22, 2008
Marathon - April 14, 2008
Birdy Longstocking - April 7, 2008
Spring Fever
- April 29, 2008
- March 2008
-
- March 31, 2008
Poor Comprehension - March 25, 2008
This Many Fingers - March 17, 2008
The Moment Between Past and Future - March 10, 2008
It's a Brand New Day - March 3, 2008
Fury
- March 31, 2008
- February 2008
-
- February 26, 2008
The Heart Is a Lonely Hunter - February 19, 2008
Famnig Hjärta - February 11, 2008
Absurdistan May Be Just a Novel to You, But It's Where I Actually Live - February 4, 2008
Sick Day, Episode Infinity Plus One
- February 26, 2008
- January 2008
-
- January 29, 2008
The Stories - January 22, 2008
Why I Need to Slow Down - January 14, 2008
Wonder Time - January 10, 2008
The Baby - January 2, 2008
Movement
- January 29, 2008
- December 2007
-
- December 25, 2007
Sorry - December 17, 2007
Girl Cub - December 10, 2007
Lucky Me - December 4, 2007
Still Waiting for the Feature Film
- December 25, 2007
- November 2007
-
- November 26, 2007
The Milestones You Never Read About - November 19, 2007
One Afternoon - November 12, 2007
I One the Sandbox Eight - November 5, 2007
More from the Chronicles of Melancholy
- November 26, 2007
- October 2007
-
- October 29, 2007
Bossy McBossypants - October 23, 2007
Ask Me Anything - October 16, 2007
The Only Girl Not in a Leotard - October 9, 2007
Off the Charts - October 2, 2007
Unconditional
- October 29, 2007
- September 2007
-
- September 24, 2007
What Gets Outgrown - September 24, 2007
All I Want for Christmas... - September 7, 2007
The Annual Camping Episode - September 7, 2007
It's All Fun and Games Here in the Police State - September 7, 2007
The Poop Whisperer - September 7, 2007
Something Fishy - September 7, 2007
Cornier Than You Might Expect - September 7, 2007
Thanksgiving, Part 2 - September 7, 2007
Thanksgiving - September 7, 2007
The Bickersons Play Cariboo - September 7, 2007
Swimming Hole - September 7, 2007
The Stranger Things That Have Happened - September 7, 2007
Bedhead - September 7, 2007
Listen Up - September 7, 2007
Guesswork - September 7, 2007
Daring - September 7, 2007
Pasta and Fear - September 7, 2007
On the Fairness of Brothers, Bugs, and Balloons - September 7, 2007
Tea Party on Acid - September 7, 2007
To Birdy at the Goose Pond - September 7, 2007
Lisin To The wind Bloe - September 7, 2007
Tears of Something - September 7, 2007
Breathless - September 7, 2007
Spring Back - September 7, 2007
On Yiddish and Other Ancient Forms of Communication - September 7, 2007
For the Love of Four - September 7, 2007
Good for Nothing - September 7, 2007
It's Better to Have Loved and Barfed... - September 7, 2007
'Complete Idiot's Guide to Enhancing Self Esteem' is the Actual Title of a Book! - September 7, 2007
A Juggling Act - September 7, 2007
Maybe for Halloween She Could Be a Toddler - September 7, 2007
On Violence - September 7, 2007
Winter Wonderland's Crotchety Neighbor - September 7, 2007
There's a Reason Why We Can't Predict the Future - September 7, 2007
Resolute - September 7, 2007
Walking a Mile in Their Shoes - September 7, 2007
Worrywart - September 7, 2007
Everything Is Sacred - September 7, 2007
Gag Me with a Doorknob - September 7, 2007
Three-Ring Circus - September 7, 2007
Little Parasites - September 7, 2007
Rhetorical Questions Like Melted Cheese Oozing into Your Head - September 7, 2007
By the Seat of Our Pants - September 7, 2007
A Little Understanding - September 7, 2007
My Lucky Number - September 7, 2007
The Invisible Woman - September 7, 2007
Morning Has Broken - September 7, 2007
Emotional Disclosure - September 7, 2007
Disaster Is a State of Mind - September 7, 2007
The 7 Habits of Highly, Um, Successful Children - September 7, 2007
The Witching Week - September 7, 2007
Learning to Worry Less - September 7, 2007
Wrestling with Restlessness - September 7, 2007
Start of the Happy-Sad Season - September 7, 2007
Goes Around and Comes Around - September 7, 2007
Why Ask Why? - September 7, 2007
Lather. Rinse. Repeat.
- September 24, 2007
- August 2007
-
- August 28, 2007
No Rest in the Restroom
- August 28, 2007
- August 2006
-
- August 27, 2006
What Naked Crabs Can Teach Us
- August 27, 2006




