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An online friend introduced her "token" system to me after I posted a message to a parenting forum about the discipline troubles I was having with Hamlet. Time-outs were not having the desired effect; taking toys away worked, but only when he was misbehaving with them.

My friend's system is so simple, it made me wonder why I hadn't thought of it, until I remembered I do everything the hard way. In essence, as she put it, it's a punishment/reward/bribery/lesson all rolled into one--and it requires nothing more than a stack of index cards.

It goes like this: each index card represents a treat, something your child really enjoys but that should be allowed only in moderation. TV, computer time, video games, foods, and toys all qualify. The child earns a card, or token, every time he helps you. That can be anything you want it to be: housework, baby care, toy or bedroom cleanup, or simply being quiet while Mommy works or rests. If he does not help, either by ignoring or flouting the rules, he loses a token.

While it's not much different from telling a child, for instance, "You can play with the water table after you help me clean up your toys," it gives the child a little more choice in consequence, but is less confusing than a behavior chart. It works for a wide range of ages; as soon as a child is old enough to understand helping, he's old enough for tokens. It also covers a wider range of behaviors, though the parent must take care not to make arbitrary and inconsistent rules.

Discipline isn't easy, but the token system can make it just a little easier.