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When I was pregnant with Hamlet, I joined an online forum of mothers whose babies were due at the same time as mine. Daily we shared the joys and trials of pregnancy. When our babies were born, we shared the joys and trials of new babies.

And the tragedy.

Two months after giving birth to her son, one woman posted a shocking message: he'd died in her arms as she burped him after a nursing.

Over the following months, she kept us posted on what had happened. The ME had ruled the death a case of SIDS, but she didn't believe him. She was a paramedic; she'd seen SIDS cases. Her son's didn't fit. She told us she thought his death was somehow related to the Hepatitis B vaccine he'd received the day before his death.

As a new parent, most of us tend to take for granted the various tests of childhood--including shots. No one in either Rain Dog's or my families had reacted in any way to immunizations. I was scared; I began to research childhood vaccines. I found the fear-mongering websites and the more tempered books, and I grilled Hamlet's pediatrician extensively. He told me that he had had similar concerns when he first started to practice medicine--but that he believed vaccines were safer now. Moreover, he'd seen the effects of some of these diseases first-hand, when he worked in South America as part of a mission.

Ultimately we did opt for the shots. Pertussis, for example, is still prevalent in the U.S. (Another friend from the same forum told us last year that her daughter had it--despite having been vaccinated. The vaccine undoubtedly made her case milder. Pretty important for a child with asthma!)

However, we imposed limits on their administration. We spread out vaccines (two at a time) and we don't immunize for diseases the boys aren't at risk from (Hepatitis B) or that are milder when contracted in childhood (chickenpox). And, while shifting epidemiology does worry me, my hope is that another 20 years of research will improve this situation as well.