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I have read that there is a certain chemical that young people have that makes them feel invincible and have a sense of immortality.  This chemical slowly dissipates as you age until at some point, maybe in your early 30's, you suddenly realize, "oh my god, I'm going to die!".  At which point the world appears extremely dangerous.  At least to people like me.

I remember my reckless teenage days with fondness, it was a lot of fun.  We did fairly stupid things on a fairly regular basis and survived to tell stories.  Except for those of us who didn't.  And if I'm honest, there were a few of them too- classmates killed in alcohol related or just reckless driving accidents.  The news would stun us, sadden us deeply; but even then, we didn't really believe it would ever happen to us.  And before long it would be as if it never happened at all.

Last night was Saturday night.  Around 8pm, I heard a lot of noise out front and looked out the window.   There were three cars, packed with teenagers parked in the middle of the street, kids streaming back and forth from a neighbors house. The girls were all dressed up in slim fitting designer jeans and slightly revealing tops covered by long silky hair.  The boys laughed comfortably with each other.  Their tight t-shirts and tan arms hung out of windows in the cars.  There had to be at least six  kids in each car.  I knew what they were feeling.   An early summer eve, close to the end of school, Saturday night, heading out to some big party... I knew it exactly. 

And yet, all I could think, was "I could never let Jack get into a car with these kids".  I know the probable drinking, the showboating, the distraction that these young driving teens will be engaged in.  To think that one day Jack will want to go off with his friends like this, it scares me to death.     Even when kids don't drink, that chemical allows them to engage in risky behavior.  Way too risky for my chemically depleted brain.

Jack is only three but I am quite seriously worried about his teenage years, effective immediately.    I am starting to understand the appeal of my parents generation where kids were often sent off to live in religious orders at 14 or 15 years old.