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When I was pregnant with my son Jack, I was sick from 4 weeks to almost 6 months. I often couldn't even look at food and, terrified my baby was starving, would try to force down nutrition shakes intended for the elderly and infirm. I lost a lot of weight initially, and assumed pregnancy was the optimal way to shed excess pounds.

When I found out I was pregnant again, I braced myself for the onslaught of nausea (and size 4 jeans). Except it didn't happen. Instead, at around 10 weeks, I was hit with an appetite befitting a sumo champion. I thought "this is what it must be like to be pregnant with a girl!" (ha!). But frankly the constantly eating is exhausting. I feel like I'm on a competitive eating circuit and my bathroom scale is screaming in protest when it sees me approaching.

At my last OB visit, I told my doctor that my appetite was out of control. She replied absently, "Oh yeah?" and continued with her paperwork. "No, really", I insisted, "I'm hungry all the time, and I feel ravenous every two hours; I get shaky and angry."

Her writing paused but she didn't look up. "Angry?" she asked. I said, "Well, 'enraged' is probably more the right word". She started to laugh, but I continued, "No seriously! If it's been two hours since I last ate, I get this sense of fury wash over me, always directed towards some idiotic thing the person I happen to be with is doing, though I know deep down, I've hit the two hour mark. Woe to the person who catches themselves with me at this point. Some primal part of my brain kicks in, with 'whoever this person is and whatever they are doing, they are in some way, directly or indirectly, preventing you from eating at this exact moment and for that, they must die. Or at the very least, suffer'."

She said, "Maybe you should keep a shake with you." "A shake?!" I exclaimed, "Are you kidding me? Didn't you just look at my weight gain chart?!" She said, "I said a PROTEIN shake."

I said, "Oh. You did? I didn't hear that part."